Have I changed much??

We all change over time; some mellow with age while others just get increasingly angst-ridden. But delving into a personality change is psychotic stuff and I will restrict myself to simple things you thought were important to your belief system once. Admittedly all change is good and if we refuse the gradual changes in our perspective, we let ourselves fall into a rot.

Earlier I judged people harshly who drank alcohol in any form, often extrapolating their fondness for alcohol as perversity of character. Now I understand that, as long as you are not a hardened alcoholic, it is fine to have some in social situations.

Earlier I sincerely believed that you fall in love only once and should be involved in a relationship only if you wish to marry that person. Experiences have taught me that things aren’t that straight forward. Moving on is an important part of your life and sometimes one does not get the things you wish for; even for no fault of yours. That’s life.

Earlier I thought physical affection was only supposed to be expressed after marriage. Premarital sex was taboo as hell. Now I am more accepting about physical affection although for some inexplicable reason, I still maintain a distance. But one-night stands are still a strict no-no.
Earlier I passionately hated smokers; considered a disgusting habit. Now I just hate smoking not the sucker at the other end of the cigarette. I just prefer that they keep their smoke out of my face.

Earlier I considered people with lesser intellectual abilities to be lowly mortals. That only enhanced my arrogant snobbish image. Now, when I have seen enough humble beings with far superior intellect, I have realized that it is not how much you know but rather how you use it. But I still am impressed with people with proven skills and abilities; I just don’t despise the ones who don’t.

Earlier I had a low opinion about homosexuals and considered their sexual orientation as despicable. Now I consider their demands to marry and co-exist amicably as an undisputable right and heartily support equal status for gays and lesbians in all walks of life.

Earlier I believed that your career and earning a livelihood was everything. Rest all falls in place. Now I know that life is not sequential and multi-tasking is not merely a quality that you cite in business interviews. Everything goes hand in hand and often happens almost at the same time.
Earlier I believed that you should have your life planned out down to the last detail. You should have a clear idea of what you want to do in life and everything should fall in place sequentially, leading to your ultimate goal. Now, I know that to make God laugh, just tell him those plans. Things happen albeit for a reason and at time you are put on hold for much longer than you anticipated. You can only give it your best shot and hope for things to fall in place. But I still believe that my destiny is in my hands.

Earlier I believed in the importance of education and thought that you can never stop learning either in school or from personal experiences. More time you spent in academics always helped you in the long run. Now; .wait a sec, I still believe that.

Waiting at the airport!!

Am waiting at the airport
All alone sitting on the chair with my laptop...

Watching people here and there
Waiting for just one hello
But no one cares for that...

Im so tired just waiting for the morning to come,
Waiting for the morning to come...

Time to say Goodbye...

The end of any relationship is difficult, whether you've spent years together or just a few months. Love isn't put to rest overnight and can linger long after you've said goodbye. Some experts say it takes half as long as the relationship lasted to process it and move on. Others say grief holds itself unaccountable and to no specific timetable, that it can go on for months and years. Rather than the duration of your time spent with each other, it is the quality, the intensity, of this time that will dictate the length and breadth of grief. A few shorts weeks with a woman you felt a true connection with might be much harder to get over than a man you liked and were with for years, but never quite meshed with. Both relationships might've been viable at one time, yet both led to the same place anyway - saying goodbye.

And it is in the parting (yes, parting is such sweet sorrow. Or, sometimes, parting is such sweet relief!) where you can begin again. Except of course if you aren't really ready to say goodbye.Breakups can be brutal, on both sides. Usually, because of a shared history and strong emotional connections, the one leaving doesn't want to hurt the one being left, and the one being left doesn't want to be let go. Those early, pure feelings of desire, which brought you two together, become tangled up in ego, in resentment and pride and the need for self-protection. You close up and off. You turn away from what you admired and respected in the other, because it's just too damn painful to see it and know that it wasn't enough, that in the end you just "weren't feeling it."

If you are the one leaving, be kind. Make the end as clean and clear as possible. Or, as a good friend of mine says, "Be sure to use a sharpened machete, not a rusty butter knife." If you cut it off, make sure that it stays off. There's nothing worse than a wishy-washy breakup. If this is what you really want, then be strong in your convictions, because the other will go on hoping against hope that you'll eventually wake up and change your mind, that you'll see what you're missing and come back around. Sometimes, you will, only to leave again. Sometimes, you won't, and regret it.

If you are the one being left, be kind to yourself. Everyone will tell you not to take it personally and you shouldn't. Try to separate your wounded ego from the reality of the situation - that for whatever reason, this other person simply didn't want what you wanted at the exact same time. I hate to reduce good, productive relationships down to timing, but more often than not, timing is all we really have to go on. If he wasn't in the right place in his life, there's nothing you could've done to change that. Patience might win out in the end, but then again, so does resentment. You can only wait around so long for someone to get his act together before you realize that "getting his act together" is just an act and that you deserve far more than this.Do not make someone a priority, if he only makes you an option. And that goes for the grief you will feel as well. Try to contain it. Let it preoccupy you less and less each day. Give it a few minutes and stick to those minutes. Remove old photos, erase voice messages, cards, trinkets, any object that reminds you of him or her.

At least for now. Later, much later, you might look back fondly on what was, but right now, you've got to let go of what isn't. If it's a nice day, go fly a kite, take a walk on the beach, look at some art. Find what makes you happy again, because that's who she fell in love with to begin with. And that's who you are anyway, even if you can't see yourself clearly through the tears. But you will. You will.

Stop expecting too much...

It's kinda funny how sometimes I catch myself feeling let down by people I consider friends...it could be a small gesture that they didn't do or a call they didn't return or a thoughtless action on their part…and often times I find myself thinking, " I give way too much." And my thoughts are no fault of theirs but simply a reflection of me. I've come to realize that the best way to stop expecting too much is to not give too much. This doesn't mean be mediocre or a lousy friend or person...it just means keeping yourself on track with how much you give. Easier said than done when giving is a second nature trait...but I've come to wonder why I've felt let down lately by people who I consider such close friends…so that is the ephiphany I've had…balance.

Romance under the stars...

It all started with a dream,

just a tiny little seed,

planted within the realm of the subconscious where my (our) heart lies;
a desire to have a good life,

To love and be loved,

together with the one who

completes this circle of existence;

Standing hand in hand

under the twilight sky

I can see it from your eyes

and I can’t dismiss this feeling;

Beneath the darkened sky,

your lips against mine, stealing small kisses

passion flying from each cell,

locked in a embrace and trying to catch a breathe,

feeling only the pounding of a restless heart;

Sitting next to you,

your head resting upon my chest, in the still of night

under star blanketed skies, star gazing,

as I gently draw you near.

Friends Forever!!!

If ever you need me, I'll be right here,

To chase away the sadness, And wipe away a tear.

If ever you need me, I'll be two steps behind,

To follow in your footsteps, And hear what's on your mind.

If ever you need me, You'll never have to fear,

That your presence isn't important, And your love isn't dear.

If ever you need me, I'll always be around,

To bring back the laughter, Where deep in your heart it's found.

You'll never have to worry, For I'll always be here,

To chase away the sadness, And wipe away a tear.

Come away with me.

Come away with in the night
Come away with me
And I will sing you a song
Come away with me on a bus
Come away where they can't tempt us With there lies
I want to walk with you On a cloudy day
In fields where the yellow grass grows
Knee-high
So won't you try to come
Come away with me and we'll kiss
On a mountain top
Come away with me
And I'll never stop loving you
And I want to wake up with the rain
Falling on a tin roof
While I'm safe there in your arms
So all I ask is for you
To come away with me in the night
Come away with me.

Kisna!!!

Interesting confusions!!!

Did your brain ever think of this...

1. Can u cry under water?
2. Do fish ever get thirsty?
3. Why don’t birds fall out of trees when they sleep?
4. What do u call a male lady bird?
5. Why is it called building when it’s already built?
6. When they say dog food is new & improved in taste, who tastes it?
7. If money doesn’t grow on trees then why banks have branches?
8. Why does a round pizza come in sqaure box?
9.Why doesn’t glue, stick to its bottle;-)..!!

Sun and Moon love!

One day Friendship & Love met one-another. Love asked Friendship -“Why do You exist if I’m there?” So Friendship said - "To give a Smile to those eyes in which You leave Tears.”

A cup of coffee

"दिए जलते हैं फूल खिलते हैं, बड़ी मुश्किल से मगर दुनिया मे दोस्त मिलते हैं..."

Always be a fighter...

I will fly high, time cannot stop me.
I will fly high, life cannot break me.

The game of Life

When I was a kid...

full of colors...

during my teenage.

and now...

but never mind I can make my life more beautiful...

it's only in my hands, no one else can do it for me.

The SPMW of my life.

Hard but you can polish it.
Precious, it has eyes. Can wound.
Would dance upon water. Sinks.
Stays put. Crushed, becomes a road.
(STONE)

Mine to give, mine to offer
No resistance. Mine
To receive you, mine to keep
The shape of our night.
(PILLOW)

My former friend, my traitor.
My too easily broken.
My still to be escaped from.
(MIRROR)

To support this roof.
To stand up. To take
Such weight in the knees...
To keep the secret.
To envy no cloud.
(WALL)

Riddle!

White of a blind man's eye
I saw rolling.
When the lid closed over,
Dark was twice dark.

Soon I saw glitter
His other eye.
Dew fell then; dark scattered.
What it saw, men saw.

Rain...

Is it raining out? Or is it raining in??

I'll always be with you...

I'll be with you wherever you go.
I'll be with you forever, you know.
When you feel a gentle breeze blowing through the trees.
If you stop and take a look, you'll see me in their leaves.
If you happen to look upon a clear dark night,
You'll see me gazing down at you through stars that shine so bright.
When you're walking along a beach of waters fresh and blue,
If you listen to the surf you'll hear me call to you.
If you are out for a walk, in a soft, warm rain,
Hold your hand out and you'll feel me touching you, again.
I will be with you wherever you go
I will be with you forever, you know.
Selfless in love with you I will be, From this moment forward, till eternity.

Im going to smile.

I'm a Lonely road of broken dreams,
Its a Boulevard that Im searching for
These stars are all so dull. It's the Moon that Im searching for...
Happiness is so Angry at Me. It's Life that Im searching for...
There is a Crowd around me at all times. It's a Friend that Im searching for...
My life is just like path. It's a Destination that Im searching for...
Don't Know what Is it that I've Lost. May be its 'ME' that Im searching For...
I don't need anyone to take advantage of my weaknesses or my strengths,
I need someone who will appreciate me for everything that I am.
I’m going to smile and make you think I’m happy,
I’m going to laugh, so you don’t see me cry,
I’m going to let you go in style, and even if it kills me,
I’m going to smile.

The shattered soul.

I'm nothing but a shattered soul. I cannot see.
Been ravaged by the chaotic beauty
Ruined by the unreal temptations. I cannot flee.
I was betrayed by my own beliefs
And my heart betrayed all dead emotions.
I could hear my breath even if I did not breathe
Now the changing tides wash over me.
And the freezing breath breezes through me.

Why?

I remember all the timeswe spent together
.Now, we don't evensee each other.
We were such great friends
When we tried something new. Everything changed.
We were such great friends,
We decided to give one more step.
From friends to couple.
From hugs to kisses.
From laughs to smiles.
From jokes to love poems.
Now we dont have none of this.
I ask myself why? How could all of this end. If we were just such good friends.

Like a cloud with no Sun in the sky...I miss you.

Im not sure where to start,
I don't know how to begin,
I guess I'll start with i miss you,
'Cause that's what I'm feeling within,

I miss you like a cloud with no sun in the sky,
It has nothing to look up to and so it cries,
Crying raindrops fall onto the ground,
To just fade to nothing, nowhere to be found,

I miss you like a tree with no leave,
Nothing to move and drift in the breeze,
Leave scattered and sodden,
Walked upon, a broke soul down trodden,

I miss you like a mouth with no tongue,
It cannot speak, all these words left unsung,
They just hang in the moment, caught up in the mind,
Words left unspoken and all left behind,

I miss you like friends all alone,
Each missing each other, calling them on the phone,
It's like no ones answering your endless calls,
Pleas echoing along deserted halls,

I miss you like a lover torn away,
From the one she cares for and thinks of each day,
When she reaches for his hand, and when she reaches for his kiss,
And theres nothing there, only memories of this,

I miss you as a lover,
I miss you as a friend,
I miss your words,
Of how we wouldn't end,

I miss you as a tree,
And i miss you as a cloud,
I miss you with every tears i cry,
Each tear shows I'm not proud,

I miss you as i fall apart,
And i reach out for you touch,
And then i remember you're not there,
God I miss you babe, so much.

no control on life, no control on time!

वक़्त !!
सब कुछ बदल देता hai
ye एहसास भी वक़्त ही कराता hai
wahi mousam wahii जगह
aur वही एहसास isliye सोचती हूँ
kash! वक़्त भी वही होता...!!

My Daddy's Hand

Daddy, Take my hand in yours and you will plainly see,

How very much I need you now to love and care for me.

As my little hand grows, I will need you even more,

Everything I do in life, I have never done before.

Teach me to be kind and loving, sharing and forgiving,

Show me through your acts of love the pure joy of living.

The years will pass by quickly and one day I will be grown,

I will pass what you have taught me onto children of my own.

Hold me always in your thoughts and remember when we are apart,

The special love between a child and a daddy's heart.

ek Soch...

Agar Ho Sake Toh Karo Khud May Kashish Paida

Har Kisi Ko Hasarat Se Dekha Nahi Karte,

Har Shaks Nahi Hota Har Shaks K Qaabil

Har Shaks Ko Apne Liye Socha Nahi Karte!!!

Iceheart.

Ice ice ice.
Melting ice melting ice melting ice...

Silence!

In a Manner of speaking I just want to say
That I could never forget the way

You told me everything

By saying nothing.

Rise up & Be thankful.

“Let us rise up and be thankful, for if we didn’t learn a lot today, at least we learned a little, and if we didn’t learn a little, at least we didn’t get sick, and if we got sick, at least we didn’t die; so, let us all be thankful.”

Laughing kids...

“Joy increases as you give it, and diminishes as you try to keep it for yourself. In giving it, you will accumulate a deposit of joy greater than you ever believed possible.”

Shades of Life (: (

People come and go!!!

Yaadein.

The tree of my life.

I came to worship Krishna, but maya caught me, bound me up, and I became like a tree. In the form of a wood-boring insect, a woman entered my heart. In the form of fruits; sons and daughters grew on my branches. In the form of a bird, time made its nest. This tree gradually dried up. Then the forest fire of birth and death came. Wicked desire and false hope were 2 streams of smoke that arose. I called out, “I am dying! “Please, O Vaisnava gosai! Shower the water of your mercy on me and save me!”

One bird. Two birds.

One bird. Two birds.

One bird. Two birds.

One bird. Two birds.

Two birds. One bird.

Two birds. One bird.

One bird two birds.

Two birds one bird.

One bird two birds.

One...

long way to go...

Memorable Moment...still

A sense of Wonder.

Sitting on Rock.

Kuch toota sa Kuch juda sa

Bloom Dedication

Learning and Growing...

They say Dreams never come True...